CD Player Mood Swings
by Nothing In Blood
Summary: {One–shot} After torturing & killing a victim, Nny finds a CD player. After listening to the song, he has a little breakdown. Warning: SONG –FIC. Rated for language & violence. Don’t expect reviews, but read it anyways....


Nny quickly whipped the splattered blood from his face onto the rag in his thin hand. That last guy squired all over him, but thankful none of this tainted blood got into Nny's eyes.

Suddenly a sharp shiver ran up his back, suddenly reminding him of the cold weather. He reached over on the pile next to the door to the living room. This pile is were the victims' clothes ended up. It is demeaning to die naked. But then again, were born naked, might as well die naked too. He pulled a long dark purple jacket for the pile and wrapped the warmth around his frail body.

He pushed the door open and strolled into the darkness of the living room; he reached around the wall before finding the switch, igniting a lone bulb on the ceiling. The light crawled over the many bloodstains on wooden floor, the knives on the wall, the noose on the ceiling. The dead animals on the wall just stared back at him with those soulless blank looks in there rotting eyes. But despite the rotting, violence and blood, Johnny was numb, not good or bad, just stuck in the middle.

After falling on the sofa, he noticed a CD player digging into his hip. His slender fingers ran over the plastic and the engraving of "Jim hollow" on the underside before they found the open button. Shining back at him in the pale light of the single light bulb was a Linkin park CD. He pulled on the headphones, which were wrapped around the player, and pushed them into his ears and started the CD. He flipped through the songs till the rhythm of one struck his ears and stuck with it.

_Nothing ever stops all these thoughts  
and the pain attached to them  
Sometimes I wonder why this is happenin'  
It's like nothing I could do would distract me when  
I think of how I shot myself in the back again  
'Cause from the infinite words I could say I  
Put all the pain you gave to me on display  
But didn't realize  
Instead of setting it free I  
took what I hated and made it apart of me_

_It Never Goes Away... x2_

_And now  
You've become a part of me  
You'll always be right here  
You've become a part of me  
You'll always be my fear  
I can't separate  
Myself from what I've done  
Giving up a part of me  
I've let myself become you  
You...  
You...  
You..._

Johnny's eyes became glossy, not with tears, but as though his mind was no longer starring at the wall but reliving memories. Thoughts were swimming around and mixing with the rhythm and sound of the music pounding in his ears.

Hearing your name  
the memories come back again  
I remember when it started happenin'  
I'd see you in every thought I had  
and then  
my thoughts slowly found words attached to them.  
And I knew as they escaped away I was  
committing myself to 'em  
And every day  
I regret saying those things  
cause now I see  
that I  
took what I hated and made it apart of me.

It Never Goes Away x2

And now  
You've become a part of me  
You'll always be right here  
You've become a part of me  
You'll always be my fear  
I can't separate  
Myself from what I've done  
Giving up a part of me  
I've let myself become you

Johnny's unblinking eyes continued to stare into the wall, as if trying to boor through it and escape the things crowding his head. Old images, terrible thought, voices and screams of the damned ringed in his ear as his heart began to race.

_  
It Never Goes Away x4 _

(get away from ME!)  
Give me my space back  
You've gotta just  
(GO!)  
Everything just comes down to memories of  
(YOU!)  
I've kept it in but now I'm letting you  
(KNOW!)  
I've let you go!  
So  
(get away from ME!)  
Give me my space back  
You've gotta just  
(GO!)  
Everything just comes down to memories of  
(YOU!)  
I've kept it in but now I'm letting you  
(KNOW!)  
I've let you go!

And now  
You've become a part of me  
You'll always be right here  
You've become a part of me  
You'll always be my fear  
I can't separate  
Myself from what I've done  
Giving up a part of me  
I've let myself become you

The voices were screaming at him now, reminding him off how fucked up he is for killing the "innocent" yet others reminding him off how much better it is over the stars, were he had a life without a insane purpose. Meanwhile, Johnny's hands held so tightly that his palms began to bleed and his knuckles were bright white. His teeth were held tightly and grinding against themselves, but these were the only signs that something was happening in his head.

_  
I've let myself become you  
I've let myself become lost inside these thoughts of you  
Giving up a part of me  
I've let myself become you….  
_

Before the song could even finish, the player was thrown against the opposite wall, sending pieces everywhere. Johnny was quickly to his feet, hands covering his ears and pacing around the room quickly, not caring that he was sending many of his things into the walls if not breaking many of them on the toe of his boots.

The voices still echoed louder and he quickly jumped to the wall of knifes. His eyes shut and he could see every voice in a physical form. From Mr. Fuck and doughboy, to that weird meat boy and nailbunny, all screaming at him to do one thing or another. Before his body could stop, he was throwing the knives in there general direction. He opened his eyes and still saw the figures there before him. As he continued to hurl the knives, trying to silence the voices, a scream spilled from his own throat. "SHUT UP!!!" slowly but surely the voice quieted and he stopped throwing the knives. The figured in front of him cleared and disappeared and the vision of his knife filled living room came into view.

Knives stuck from the walls and sofas. They had sliced through his bunny ears on the TV, some of his happy noodle boy posters and many were lying on the floor. He glanced down at his hand and noticed the gashes in his palm from his fingernails and many cuts from the knives climbing up his wrist and onto his arms. Deep red blood dripped from many and beaded the skin on others. He again reached in his pocket and pulled out that bloodstained rag and cleaned himself up.

He pulled himself from the floor, where he had slid to some time during the whole thing and walked over to his desk and opened his diary, leaving some bloody fingerprints.

"Dear die-ary,

Im never listening to Linkin Park again"

* * *

God, I really hate writing song flics. I really do. Most people hate them. I do too, but I heard that Linkin park song and I have a lot of unusual and depressing memories and emotions attached to that song and I had to find a way to deal with them. Unlike Nny, I can't throw knives around in the living room….. Though there are a few things broken in my room…. 

Disclaimer: there is a reason it is called _fan_fiction. If you can't guess that reason, then you are too stupid to read JtHM. …I don't own the wonderful and glorious Nny.

Disclaimer #2: I don't own the song "figure.09" from Linkin park. If I owned it, then it would be destroyed and/or buried underground to be found in billions of years.

Don't expect reviews, but they would be very nice if there good.They fuel my brain cell, its lonely right now....


End file.
